Our family

Our family

Wednesday, August 29, 2007


"taDA!" a little hop on one foot with the arms outstretched and a smile on his face. No reaction from the crowd, so another louder and with more feeling "TAADAAA!"

"Mikey did you finish your chalk art? it looks great!"

"yeah!" an enthused Mikey answers.

But where did he get this from? The TADA. It is great, delivered with such sincerity and no bragging intended, he just wanted to share in his accomplishment. Whatever he intended to accomplish he had and isn't that great! Mikey we joke has middle child syndrom. He is good, reliable, able to play on his own or with his siblings, he is easily overlooked. I do remind myself to take time and sit and talk or play with him. Maybe it is working because there he is open and proud and happy to share in his moment. It is one of those moments when I allow myself to stop worrying.
I remember when the triplets first arrived I worried all day everyday for months. It was exhuasting. People would whisper or just say it plainly "how will she do it?" or "ugh, I could never one drove me nuts" Then one day I was tired of the worrying and a thought formed in my mind. What if everything is okay. What if they are all just fine. What if my inability to provide each child with endless hours of single minded focus on them is actually not a problem, or at least balanced out by the fact that they have eachother. I never breathed so easily in all of my life. Because it rang very true to my ears. As the Who said 30 years ago "the kids are alright" and they are.

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Finally the birthday montage is complete

As you can see I have a new look on the site. I am thinking it may be a little to understated, though I think it is easier to read the text. We'll see if it will stay.
Yes the montage is finally done! I am happy it is done, because by now my thoughts have turned to the end of one of the best summer's of my life. Granted this does not mean that it was stress free or relaxing, but wow, how exciting and fun, fun, fun!
Now we are buying school supplies as my boys begin their real school days.

Sunday, August 5, 2007

It's all in that moment

This has been a busy summer so far, and things don't look like they will be slowing down for the month of August. On Tuesday the kids and I hit Nonnis' pool. It was tough keeping an eye on all 5, though they did cooperate and put on their life vests. After a few hours I dried them off and brought them to McDonald's for dinner. My nerves were frayed from the swimming and I felt too tired to face cooking, let alone that, I had it in my mind that we needed to go to the grocery store to buy cake mix to make a cake for gram and grandpa.
How I thought that would go well is beyond me. It may have been because the previous day Steve and I brought them all to Costco, where we piled them all on flatbed cart and managed to buy what we needed and get all of them home alive so I got to feeling emboldened.
We were a sight at the grocery store(did I mention I had Leo with me?) So the 7 of us somehow make it through the overcrowded aisles with the babies throwing random things in the cart. Some items I couldn't even identify. The kids won't go in the cart, they prefer to hang onto the sides with their feet on the under basket, facilitating easy on off as needed in their 2 year old minds. There were some minor injuries, but these were no deterrent to the daredevil travel mode with easy access to all things shiny. Oh they were happy.

All of this swimming, Mcd's and grocery shopping leads up to the arrival home and the spotting of fireflies. This was an awe inspiring moment for the 5. Matthew was thrilled to catch them and put them in their brand new "habitat". Seeing those fire flies brought me back 30 years . When we would spot fireflies, my dad would say,"well that's the end of summer!" All the feelings that would bring to my 10 year old mind. Profound sadness that the long, shiftless days of summer were coming to an end, and the anxiety and hope that a new school year brings. And now all these years later feeling the same exact emotions as I watch my 5 year olds, who are oblivious to the change their lives will be taking in 3 short weeks, run around chasing fire flies.
Matthew said that night that he now has to take care of his fish, his firefly and a bug that is also in his habitat so he would be very busy tomorrow. I loved that.

The inconsequential moments seem to strike me as magnified and more important then the big events I plan. There is something in these moments that feel more revealing
even like a thread being weaved through our lives that holds the family together stronger then the big splashy trips and I constantly plan for us.

It is like rising above the din to see the whole picture caught in one single moment. We are healthy, we are safe, we have all of our needs met and more. When you think of all of the suffering in this world, the children who get cancer the families living in the chaos of war and poverty. We are so lucky, so incredibly blessed. That I send out a little prayer of thanks and a simultaneous plea for help for those who can't have what I have so easily.

I find inspiration in the simple gestures the kids share so readily. When Mark decides to haul a huge, filled watering can to accomplish some task only known to his 2 year old mind. Matthew casually walks up and says "let me help you with that." and easily takes the can from Mark's hands and brings it across the yard for him.

Or when Christopher's patiently sits on the couch reading a book to Mikey or explaining how a game is played on the computer. Chris's voice soft and sweet saying "good job Mikey, you did it."

Or when Cara is swimming with me and opens her hand to show me she has caught a frog! When I scream she calmly looks at me and says "mommy frog yucky?" Her head tilted in interest, while her eyes intensely monitor my response to her find. You can almost see her thinking.

Or after Mikey falls in the pool, head first no less, I grab him and he looks at me and says " momma, I fall in agua."
"yes, sweetie." I calmly say, "you fell in the agua." While in my head I am screaming "oh my God, I can't believe you fell in the water, what if I wasn't watching, this could have ended so differently!"
After a beat he says again "momma I fall in the agua with my head"
"yes, you did, you fell in the agua with your head" I respond.
"momma I fell in the agua, my head!"
"you did Mikey, you fell in the agua with your head first, you poor thing." I respond again.
Then he gets up and goes back to filling his bucket out of the pool, which is exactly what he was doing before he fell in the pool.

Conversations exactly like this happen all day for every scrape bump and hurt feelings that my 5 experience. They tell me what happened and what the offending person or thing was that caused their injury. I love listening to them giver thier account of the events. My listening sets things straight for them. They can carry on, once they are sure I understood exactly what happened and sympathize with their plight. Being understood deeply is important every age or our lives it seems. I am glad I know how to do this and that they actually seek me out exactly for this purpose. I feel happy even honored to be a part of these conversations.

So when you see me stressed out and disheveled, feel free to lend a hand but never feel bad for me, because cranky kids and frazzled mom moments are a small price to pay for all of the beautiful moments that make up my days.

Friday, August 3, 2007

Awesome visitors

This is the montage of really our best week of the summer. The girls added so much positive, fun energy to our home it was great to host them. They also did an incredible amount of work, most of which had to take place after long days in the city or the beach. We were thrilled to have the rest of the Rochester Kissinger's join us later in the week, though we did miss Sue.
Thanks to Kate and Sara the word awesome has been in the top rotation of words that I use on a daily basis. Their deadpan deliver of this one word, was just hysterical. I feel somewhat caught up on the music scene, as well as who's who in Hollywood.
I think that Sara really topped the week off by brining home the much beloved Sir Turtle, it was awesome. The somanila infested mess of a pet he is, he still gets much of the conversational time at our house. We of course are fielding requests for somanila pets from the 5 year old set. I think if the 2 and half year old group could pronounce turtle or somanila we would be fielding requests from them as well, you do have to be thankful for small miracles in this case that they can't pronounce those words.
We love you all and can't wait to see you again. A big thanks to Russ for putting in the effort it takes to have this all happen.