Which is the illusion?

Oh the holidays have come and gone. They were fantastic, but one thing that is a challenge is that preparing takes you away from the kids so much, for shopping, baking, decorating, packing, the list is endless, and the nanny's hours increase and your hours with them decrease. I am glad to have all of 2007 new Christmas memories, but whew they take a lot of work!
Throuout the time I would see every one of you kids as if removed. I live in awe and wonder of each of you. At times you seem so big with your noise and demands but then I can see you are so small and precious. Such a mix of contradictions you each are.

I was busy baking and I saw you skip across the room to retrieve an errant toy.
You looked over and caught my eye
in the half a second I saw you.
Your so vulmerable and small
So strong and able
capable and compassionate


I was busy in the kitchen and you were on the floor writing solor system on a paper. You looked up and for a 1/2 second I saw you.
So fragile and honest
so intelligent and full of love
sweet and funny


I was busy cleaning when you literally hopped into the room
you looked up and for a 1/2 a second I saw you
such thin little arms
so graceful and atheltic
warm and open


I was so busy cooking when you ran past me
and glanced over and for a 1/2 of a second I saw you
innocent and trusting
laughter and joy
so steady and able


I was busy doing laundry when you came charging in the room
you look for me and I see you
pretty and unassuming
mischivous and intellegent
comfortable and self assured.

Each time my heart jumps to my throat.
Tears rush to my eyes
you look so little from a distance but you are all full of confidence and stregnth that I don't know which is the illusion.